Raising Beautiful Girls

I get lots of comments on how beautiful our girls are.  I try to always be gracious and say thank you.  Of course, we think they are beautiful.  I tell them many times a day how pretty they are, how pretty their hair is, or how lovely their smiles are.  I want them to feel pretty just the way God made them. 

Blue-eyed Baby

There is a danger though when it comes to raising little girls in our society - The danger of making it too much about how they look!  We see it when little girls are dressed inappropriately at young ages, when preteens are already obsessed with their weight, and with girls who only feel pretty if someone is telling them that they are pretty (and the parents' opinion doesn't count).

Chocolate covered cutie

So after much prayer, observation, and consideration, we have come up with a few things to consider as we raise our beautiful girls:

1.  We want our girls to be content with the way God created them.  So many women are obsessed with changing something about their outward appearance that it changes their self-perception and occupies too much of their mind.  I'm not saying they won't have braces or ever pluck their eyebrows, but things about their bodies that are unchangable should not be despised.
2.  We want our girls to take care of their bodies.  This means having good hygiene and learning to maintain their bodies.  We want them to have healthy habits like wearing sunscreen and flossing. 
3.  We will not participate in "so-called beauty pageants". Our girls are only 2 & 3 and don't even know what a beauty pageant is, but I believe at this age the pageants are more for the parents than for the child.  Changing a child's appearance with over done hair, makeup, and spray tans is making little girls into little adults - not promoting the things that make these little girls naturally beautiful. 
4.  We will emphasis inner beauty five times as much as outward beauty.  Some of the most beautiful women I know are plain women who exude inner beauty in their lives.  I want our girls to reflect a beautiful soul.
5.  We will dress our children in age-appropriate and modest clothing.  I am shocked sometimes at the way toddlers are dressed and at the clothing available for little girls.  String bikinis are not cute on 18 month-olds... ever!  I know this will be a battle until adulthood, but it is one I am passionate about.  Modesty is not a virtue in our culture.
6.  We will teach our children to see the beauty in others. Little girls learn to be mean to other girls and are usually critical of how other girls look and dress.  I believe all children are beautiful.  I believe everyone has something about them that is pleasing - eyes, smile, hair, personality.
7.  We will try to be the main influence in their lives as parents and not let media, culture, or peers take our place.  We are already very selective in what our children are exposed to.  We don't watch a lot of commercial television (we record most things and skip the commercials), we only watch age appropriate things, and we greatly limit our girls' exposure to other children.  Yes, we are over-protective.  Yes, we will continue to be over-protective.  Yes, I believe so many children are under-protected. 

Hat-loving little girl

I know as our girls get older there will be many more challenges concerning their looks.  This list will change and evolve as they grow and as we, as parents, learn.  We will make mistakes.  But, I believe it is worthy to have a goal.  I believe it is smart to know what habits and behaviors you would like to avoid and to have a gameplan as to how to do just that.  I believe that I only get one shot at this and that it is worth my time and energy to raise beautiful girls.

Sitting-pretty baby